Does the memoir futures market have you counting pennies? Do you hate those shitty, Papyrus-fonted chapbooks you found at that Regional Poetry Fair? Can’t stop tossing away money for contests, can you? Contests that always seem to break for some well-connected joker with a haircut like a dope. Sick of the mishigas (sp?) on Submishmash? [Ed. Note – Oh it’s just called Submittable now? Whatever.] Feeling duo-TRAPPED by duo-TROPE? Seen one too many authors on Twitter spouting corny, milquetoast hyperbole in praise of one another? Drank too much coffee this morning, did you? Drank too much coffee and vaped too hard???? Got that popcorn lung? Carpet tongue? Ennui? Presque vu? Want to jam that Pilot G2 up your nose and give it a good hammer with the table?

That’s why Hitler had to take that pill.

What’s Spuyten Duyvil, anyway? Was the Hudson Review seriously ever a thing? They published Carver, right? Or no, I think they had an early Mary Gaitskill story? Something like that. I seem also to recall something about the Poetix program at SUNY Buffalo? On the legitimacy topic: is Naropa for real? The Black Mountain School? Puerto del Sol? Jubilat? NOON? Is flash fiction real? Is it actually?

“Should I submit this story to the New Yorker, yea or nay?”

(Answer: first try the Atlantic. If you get in there, you should’ve sent to the New Yorker.)

On these questions and more, 7 out of 10 adjunct comp professors agree: the Lit Runt TiPSHEET, it appears to be some kind of a publishing newsletter.

That’s right, friends: the Lit Runt TiPSHEET. Sign up before the NRA nixes poetry for good.

[Header Image – u/gwywnc]

[Porsche 911 “Getaway Cars” – Chiat Day]